Week 7 - Fitzpatrick - Dying and Spirituality

In the seventh week of class, we had to read chapter 12 of our Lifesmart text, Dying and Spirituality. In this chapter we read about death, the four types of death (clinical, brain, biological, and social), grief and the three types unresolved grief (delayed, distorted, and complicated), the role of funerals, dealing with one’s own death and the five stages of grief, death with dignity and the Death With Dignity Act (289), hospice, suicide and gender influence, and spirituality.

            Growing up the son and grandson of funeral directors, my life has been revolved around the death and the funeral industry for as long as I can remember. I have had the ability to see the inner workings of the funeral industry, and the effect death can place on family and loved ones, whether sudden or expected. As a result, I have been raised to understand that life, at some point, will end, at any time in any way. Therefore, even at 33 years of age, I have life insurance, a living will, and funeral and burial arrangements already processed in the event of a spontaneous demise. Although difficult to fathom, I would highly recommend doing so in life, as to not only guarantee your own final wishes but also to free the burden of making said arrangements onto your loved ones in their time of mourning and grief.

            Some interesting topics were brought up in this chapter that I took particular interest in. One strong take away I got out of this chapter was on page 283, when the text speaks of the role and interpretation death may have on older children and adolescents. Speaking as a future educator, it is important to understand the thoughts and emotional processes one’s students may possess in the event of a loved one’s passing. It is important to remember that children in the preoperational and concrete operational stages of early and middle childhood view attachment as a major focus in their development (282), and that the loss of such attachment from a loved can be substantial, as they cannot abstractly process the information (283). Therefore, as the text states, these children need close contact and reassurance in these times of grief. However, with parents and others around said students concurrently acting in grief, it will be of utmost importance as a third party to be available for students in the time of need during this phase. Compassion toward the student will be of high value both in and out of the classroom. As a teacher, I should engage the student on the topic and unilaterally sympathize so that the student knows they are cared for in a time when it may not feel so.

            In high school, I had a friend who committed suicide. He was not a close friend of mine, although we sat together at lunch and had great conversations. He was, however, great friends with a lot of my great friends at the time. As much as I felt sorrow and grief for my friend, I felt strong sympathy for my other friends, watching them mourn over someone they truly loved when there was no reason to. It is painful because there were no warning signs. He was a great kid, and one of the funniest people I have had the chance to meet in my life. What can we do as a society, and specifically as future educators, to try and notice signs of teen distraught and sadness, when no signs seem to be present?

            One topic brought up in this chapter that was of high interest to me was death with dignity, and the Death with Dignity act passed on Oregon in 1997 (289). According to the text, this law allows doctors in Oregon to prescribe medication to patients that will assist in their choice to pass but are not allowed administer the drugs, leaving the patients to administer the medication to themselves (290). It is my belief that man has free will and reserves the right to choose whether they wish to receive assistance in the ending of their own life, within limitations, specifically life-threatening diseases such as terminal cancer and AIDS. I do believe that as conscious bystanders, a family may not agree with the wishes of the individual, however, in the end, the only one that truly understands the suffering one may be going through is the one themselves. I believe it is unfair and incorrect to believe the law should have the ability to tell a sick and pained individual that they have no choice live through the pain until the body finally ceases to function unexpectedly, rather than allow an opportunity for that person, even with medical assistance, to end their suffering knowingly and quietly.